Do Your Part or Stop Complaining (or both!)

Years ago I remember spending time complaining about how my ex-husband (oh, how I hate that word- but that's another story) was not paying child support. I was complaining to my James Group the Other Half (read Al-Anon) sponsor. Her response was basically that I needed to do something about it or stop complaining. Had I done my part? Had I filed child support papers with the attorney general? No. Then stop complaining. It was hard to hear, but a lesson I needed to learn. I wasn't emotionally ready to go to court, so I decided that my only appropriate course of action was to stop complaining. If I wasn't ready to do my part, how could I complain that he wasn't doing his part. (FYI a few years later I was ready and filed. :))

This lesson has helped me several times in my life. First, it's helped me as a parent. When my youngest was maybe two, I was at my wit's end. I mean, he was doing things he shouldn't be doing and saying things that he shouldn't be saying. Frustratingly enough, me simply saying "NO!" from across the room was not working. Imagine that. He was not meeting my expectations at all. It was at this time that I purchased and read the updated "Strong-Willed Child" by James Dobson. I realized of course that I was not doing my part. It was my job to teach him. If I loved this child and wanted to do right by him, then I needed to get up and walk across the room, kneel down to his level and say "NO!" in his face. It showed him I was serious and that I cared enough to make the effort. Of course, I would have to do this about a thousand times a day for years.

From time to time as a parent I still have to have a get serious moment with myself when I find myself being frustrated and overwhelmed by my children's behaviors. What had I done to help the situation? What was my part? Had I done my part? More often than not, I hadn't. I had to remember that I'm the adult and needed to just suck it up and do what needed to be done- be that grounding, turning off the wifi, setting up teacher conferences, etc. It is my job, after all, to teach them.

Just today I realized that I have also had to learn this lesson as a teacher. It is all to easy to gripe and complain about my students. Yesterday I was especially frustrated at the increased amount of talking and the decreased amount of working that was taking place. I was losing it. In speaking (read complaining) with a wise co-worker, I was reminded, "Have you done this? Have you done that?" In my head, I'm thinking, "Ugh! That is too much work! They need to just be quiet and work!"

I realized, once again, that it is my job to teach them. This morning in a staff meeting, we heard the phrase, "Teacher behavior drives student behavior." Sigh. Yes, it's up to me. So, I took a deep breath and simply took the time to do some re-teaching. Not yelling, not demoralizing, but re-teaching. Did it take time? Yes. Did I want to do it? No. Was it my decision to do it? Yes. Was it work? Yes. Are my students (and my sanity) worth it? You bet!

Talk is cheap. Anyone can complain about a situation. What needs to happen is someone needs to do something about it.

Back to School *insert clever saying here*

Social media is full of fun posts about back to school. Videos of dancing orangutans to describe the joy parents are feeling, and of Michael Scott screaming, "NO!" to describe how teachers are feeling. I have teacher friends who have been posting about working in their rooms, getting everything ready. Me? I haven't even stepped foot in my school since June 6th. I won't lie. I love summer, er, summer break! Sleeping late, lazy days, summer camp, youth group mission trip, fun outings, family fun, sleeping late, lazy days, you get the idea. I love summer break!

Don't get me wrong- I also love my job. I'm incredibly blessed to have it. I work in a fantastic place with even more fantastic people! And, I work with many believers- how great is that? But, I'm lazy, so sleeping late and lazy days are precious to me. Smile.

So, when back to school time rolls back around, I moan and groan. I will get my classroom in order in time. I will be grateful and happy to come to work, but a part of me is screaming, "No!"

I've always tried to love people and show Jesus in my job, even though I have struggled greatly with it. I have considered that I'm an employee of God, not CFB. But, I've kind of had the mindset of, "Well, as long as I have to be here to support my family, I should act like God wants me to."

But, lately, I'm seeing going back to school differently. God has been working extra hard on my heart this past week or so. "I have a job for you- a mission field. And it's at Vivian Field Middle School in Farmers Branch."

Will I accept his assignment?

Will I be eager to meet my new students?
Will I spend time to get to know them?
Will I be able to show love to them even when they aren't lovable?
Will I be patient with them when they act like average 7th graders?
Will I be eager to get to know my new co-workers (and the returning ones)?
Will I spend time to get to know them?
Will I be able to show love to them even when they aren't lovable?
Will I be patient with them when they act like average adults?
Will I show Jesus and share Jesus with students and staff every opportunity I can?

Gulp.

That means telling myself no. A lot.
That means being positive. A lot.
That means taking a deep breath. A lot.

God has set a task before me. Has he set one before you?

How can I scream, "No!" to such a call?

As a baptized believer, I have the Holy Spirit living inside of me! INSIDE OF ME, PEOPLE! THE HOLY SPIRIT! How dare I not let him have control!

Join me as God sends his people into the school system. Join me as we answer God's call to go into all the world. And pray for me. Pray for all teachers. Pray that we treat his children the way he wants us to.

Back to school? You bet!

"Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age." Matthew 28: 18-20

Matthew 5:43-48 for Teachers

You have heard that it was said, ‘Love the good kids and hate the others.’ But I tell you, love the kids that cause problems and pray for those who make you want to tear your hair out, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes His sun to rise on the kids from loving homes and kids from neglectful homes, and sends rain on the gifted students and the struggling students.

If you love those students who do all their work and don't get on your nerves, what reward will you get? Don't all teachers do that? And if you smile and speak nicely only to your students who smile and speak nicely to you, what are you doing more than others? Doesn't everyone do that?

I tell you, I want you to be different. Love the kid that never does his work. Smile and be kind to the kid who never has her supplies. Encourage the child who is constantly getting office referrals. Show respect to the student that does not show respect to you. Show mercy to the student who makes you want to scream, or quit, or both. Show grace to the child who just never seems to know what is going on. Speak calmly to the child who asks you what they are supposed to do when you just gave the directions for the tenth time.

Love them. All of them. Each of them. For this is the way our Father in heaven loves us- when we don't deserve it.

And, oh how glad I am He does!
cgh